“I began to picture the world without me in it.” ― Jean Kyoung Frazier, Pizza Girl
This rollercoaster of a novel follows an apathetic eighteen-year-old Korean American pizza girl, who is so disenchanted with her life, she does everything in her power to not even live it. Grieving the loss of her alcoholic father (in the most destructive way possible), avoiding her doting mother, drifting from her adoring live-in boyfriend, she shuffles through her completely directionless life with no consideration for her future or her baby’s.
Lost and in denial, our nameless heroine’s life changes when she becomes obsessed with Jenny, a stay-at-home mom who begins ordering pickle-covered pizzas for her son. Jenny is approaching middle age, unkempt and lonely. Our heroine is questioning her lack of enthusiasm about being a mother and her life in general. Their complicated lives converge in Jenny’s messy living room one afternoon, and spill over into mom support groups and beyond, before they come to a head at the novel’s end, when it becomes impossible to ignore what’s standing right in front of them.
“I realized how avoidance was the most attention you could give something.”
Despite its momentum, there is substantial heaviness in this otherwise carefree read. Once it starts, it doesn’t slow down, but it doesn’t hit the gas either. It seems to lazily follow Pizza Girl’s steps in her life right up until they lead her to Jenny’s doorstep. Discovering her motivations, her traumas, and revelations alongside her, step by step, had me questioning her reliability as narrator at times, until the finale when you can finally see the bigger picture and put everything into perspective. Ultimately, she must face her past and her present if she wants to have a future.
Offbeat and brilliant, this novel is original, and the characters are genuine. The personalities woven throughout the novel are as sincere as they are hysterical, and as serious as they are stereotypical. There’s not a single character in this book you haven’t met before, but the fresh air breathed into their unique circumstances sets it apart from any other “finding yourself” novel.
For me, the best part of Pizza Girl is the way it slowly unwinds, revealing how just one interaction with a single person can impact your life forever. This novel shows how easy it is to eject yourself from your own life, but how impossible it is not to affect others in the process. Unexpectedly heartbreaking but overall hilarious, Pizza Girl is the portrait of a mixed-up teenager just trying to navigate her existence and find out who she really is. And when our heroine faces her own music, the future is finally bright and illuminating, for everyone. If you are feeling a little lost or directionless, or finding yourself unsure of the decisions you have made in your life and especially the ones you haven’t, then this is the book you’ve been waiting for.
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